My Intern Moved Across the Country to Avoid Writing 2 Articles

"Dionysus is throwing an All Summer Ambrosia party"

Thalia ⚡ Immortal Wit and Mike Schuster ⚡ Immortal Wit

Jul 29, 2026

Hello Readers,

Well, it turns out my intern, Mike Schuster, was not pulling a prank and in fact moved across the country for what I can only assume is to avoid writing two articles. He says it’s because he needs a job because I don’t pay him anything but my keen womanly intuition knows it’s most likely to get out of writing these last two weeks.

I would write the articles myself but I can’t because Dionysus is throwing an All Summer Ambrosia party that just so happens to land on Wednesdays (and the entire summer) so I am too busy.

I expect articles will resume two weeks from now once Mike stops tricking me! I did hire him for his wit so I guess that’s on me.

In fact, since I am such a nice person, Mike, if you write an article next time, I will double your pay.

Thanks!

Thalia

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